A Game I Play in My Head

The first time I learned about the word oxymoron in an English class it just stuck. It seems like my life has been filled with examples. It has always been fun to recognize them. We see many in the course of a day. Back in the day when I taught language arts it was one of the lessons I enjoyed until one day when a student said something to me and I said, now that’s an oxymoron. The next day, I was called in to hear that a parent complained because her son said I called him a moron. (I digress)

There are times we are reminded when we are frustrated like standing in an “express line” forever in the store or when you are at a “stop and go” gas station and a message pops up to go inside and then you wait in line for the receipt.

This week facebook has people posting a bunch of retro photos. I started going through some old photos and said oh no, not that one I was just a “little pregnant” there. No one is a little pregnant or “slightly overweight” for that matter. How does one get the tag “pretty ugly”?

The grocery isles are the worst. Who thought of Chocolate ‘Nilla wafers?
There is “designer beer”, “diet ice cream”, “jumbo shrimp”.

Clothing we wear offer food for thought, like “dress jeans” or “loose tights”. You get invited to a gathering and the dress is “dressy casual”. The first time I heard this term I thought someone was messing with me.

Today I heard two more in a conversation with friends. One friend said he liked “planned spontaneity” and the other said their life was “organized chaos”.

Me, I hope to be a “mildy psychotic”, “young sixty” next year, maybe be “half naked” drinking a “dry martini” on a beach somewhere playing my “moron” game.

This blog idea hit me today when I saw the big new wall on the turnpike. It now blocks the view of Florida’s magnificent herons and ibis wildlife I used to see on my morning drive. But wait, what’s that I see, they have engraved pictures of wildlife on the walls. I wonder if that is an oxymoron????????